Are You A Certified Asshole?

Sure it’s a promo for his new book, but Bob Sutton is offering us all a chance to see if we’re assholes with the Asshole Rating Self-Exam (ARSE).

After 24 questions like “You secretly enjoy watching other people suffer and squirm” (hey, what’s wrong with a little schaedenfreud?) you’ll find yourself placed somewhere on the scale from possible liar to full-blown certified asshole.

  • You don’t sound like a certified asshole, unless you are fooling yourself.
  • You sound like a borderline certified asshole, perhaps the time has come to start changing your behavior before it gets worse.
  • You sound like a full-blown certified asshole to me, get help immediately. But, please, don’t come to me for help, as I would rather not meet you.

And if that isn’t enough self-abuse, another quiz asks “do you make air travel miserable for everyone else?”

I take some offense at the suggestion in one question that asking for extra refreshments is bad behavior, as I feel I can never get enough to drink on a plane, but at least the scale seems a little easier:

  • You are too perfect to be true, I don’t believe you.
  • You sound like a generally civilized passenger to me.
  • You are a borderline “Flying ARSE,”
  • You are a certified “Flying ARSE.” I hope that you don’t sit near me.
  • You are a certified “Flaming Flying ARSE.” I wish that airlines could ban you from flying.